Easily the Best Summer Associate Perk I've Heard Yet

Holy shite. As if it weren't enough that these fucks get paid $3k/wk even though they haven't even graduated yet, now there's this.

Yes, I'm jealous. Fucking bastards.

A question for everyone here

If you end up (or endED) up receiving and accepting an offer at the end of your second summer, how will / did it affect you 3L life? My schedule next semester is already fantastic (all req blocks out of the way; no class on Fridays), and my class ranking is more or less set in a good place. If I have a job lined up I can't imagine I'll be working very hard.

Thoughts?

Explanation re: recent slacking in my macking and slippin in my pimpin

Faithful readers, I apologize for the weakness lately. Things are happening, but just as Fawkes commented below, I can't afford to get fired so no blogging at work. That said, I'll try to pick it up some.

As for the future, my schedule next semester is a joke, which will provide plenty of opportunities to spew forth my twisted and obnoxious views. Please, I beg you, bear with me!

Godspeed,

Moustache, J.

To facebook or not to facebook?

One of the first things they told us in 1L orientation was to delete our online social network profiles. They must have known that then we wouldn't (after all, then what the hell would we do in class), because the next thing they said was to at least put them on restricted viewing... or at the very minimum, clean up all content to a level you wouldn't mind a potential employer seeing.

So this cautionary direction came to mind when I sat at my computer earlier tonight deciding whether or not I should send friend requests to the associates at the summer firm I'm working for. The very first alert that shot up in my mind was ABSOLUTELY NOT--ARE YOU FUCKING DEMENTED. But the more I thought about it, the more I was tempted. What would I gain from doing this? Just about nothing. And despite the obvious fact that I don't want people gathering around a computer tomorrow laughing at pictures of me lying on the floor with a watermelon on my head, I still kind of think it seems like a good idea.

More attorney word mastery

All spoken by the same lawyer during a hearing:

- "Your Honor, if I may inject for a second..." [interject?]

- "...given the Penelope of the circumstances..." [panoply?]

- "...as the saying goes your Honor, 'a bird in the hand is worth one in the bush.'" [two in the bush]

If THESE people passed the bar exam...

Well working for Judge X thus far has been a very valuable experience. I've been privy to some pretty piss poor lawyering performances--one guy used horrendous grammar, made up words and didn't even know the law regarding the charge for which his client was on trial. Furthemore:

Judge X: MR. Z, these requests for jury instructions appear instead to be some sort of a closing argument. Did you actually have any instructions you wanted to submit?

Mr. Z (Inept Defense Counsel): [staring vacantly] Uh, no... your Honor.

In another trial, a PD was virtually inaudible throughout the duration, missed huge points and connections, and irritatingly swayed back and forth in one spot during her entire closing argument. There have however been some impressive performances as well, but the bulk of the experience has been great due mainly to the fact that the judge is fantastic. Judge X goes to great lengths to answer any questions I have and to explain any points of procedure or law I may be fuzzy on. I also recently went with Judge X to a lunch meeting with one of the Justices of our state's Supreme Court, which was obviously pretty cool.

Summa summa summa tiiiiiiiiiime

Well it's been less than two weeks since I finished the last final of my first year and I've spent most of that time drinking and stuffing my face. I did start my summer "job" today though, and the judge I'm working for is cool as hell so I've got that going for me.

I'll post something neat once some crazy shit happens this summer.